Latest Tweets:

marcobodt:

my brother went off to college 3 weeks ago and has not texted me at all until this

marcobodt:

my brother went off to college 3 weeks ago and has not texted me at all until this

(Source: bepsiboy, via the-drummist)

officialwhitegirls:

signal boost!!

officialwhitegirls:

signal boost!!

(Source: iraffiruse, via a-drunken-mermaid)

cramp:

fuck off mum im trying to save the planet

cramp:

fuck off mum im trying to save the planet

(Source: mikevenom, via the-drummist)

bakasara:

dahliasheng:

thebloggerbloggerfun:

Supernatural AU where every time Dean and Cas stare at each other for longer than five seconds Sam glares at the camera and it zooms in on his face like The Office. 

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This brought me to tears OH MY GOD

(via a-drunken-mermaid)

vampirevvekend:

one time at h&m i thought a guy was a mannequin so i started feeling the material of his coat and i screamed when he moved and we were both really freaked out

(via yourdisenchantedromance)

itsdemonssammy:

blaming your parents for your unattractive genetics

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(Source: celebooty, via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

(Source: tittled, via flygoing)

lesbeeanmovie:

greencarnations:

cinematicsymphony:

This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.

CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:

  • do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
  • go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
  • if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
  • look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
  • the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
  • works every time

"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING

(Source: kaliskadyami, via thewitchkingofmordor)

*10

(via the-drummist)

herwhisperisthe-jyp:

i had a dream that i was walking around in a shirt with stalks of corn all over it and somebody was like “wtf are u wearing?” and i said “it’s a crop top” i laughed so hard that i woke up

(via ukulelol)

(Source: memewhore, via ukulelol)